The Pig Impressions have Begun

It’s been two nights since the pig impressions have begun.

At first, while it was occuring during daytime naps, it was cute.  It was more than cute, actually, it was downright adorable — especially when Elise started making distinct snorting sounds.  She even chuckled along with us after a good long snort, once.

But now, it’s different.  Now, it’s not so cute any more.  Now, it’s all night long, after their second feeding, around 3am.  A bicycling of the legs in their Kiddopotamus SwaddleMe wraps, a nearly-constant torrent of grunts, hacks, squeaks and peeps, and a general squirminess that lasts until their next feeding, now a shorter two hours later.  They sound like a horde of pigs rooting through the underbrush in search of truffles.

We are zombies, or more accurately, Idoia is a zombie.  I am fluttering through existence nowadays as a multiurnal cohabitor of night and day.  I never know what time it is, and I am really fuzzy on what day it is, most of the time.  She’s taken to napping in the a.m. with the swaddled girls resting next to her in the bed, in the spot I attempted to sleep earlier.  I take these early morning opportunities to either write, catch up on email, or sleep on the couch, which is far more comfortable than my bed lately.

For the second, or maybe third night in a row, the kicking and grunting has been constant.  They aren’t crying.  Their diapers have been changed.  They just ate.  They aren’t cold or hot.  They don’t have gas, because they just produced their award-winning belches and/or farts.  They’re just grunty.  Like old men clearing their throats in the morning, or crusty old smokers wheezing between productive coughs.  And the weirdest part of this is that they’re asleep the whole time.

I’m reading that this is normal, and a phase.  It has something to do with their intestinal development.  Ironic that their intestinal development puts our intestinal fortitude to the test.  Most of these “issues”  seem to be normal developmental quirks, so I’ve decided that a return to my previous position of “don’t worry about anything” is a wise move.  After all, what has worrying ever done for me?