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Grocery Store Outing
Posted on June 17th, 2008 by Chris.
Filed under: Absurd, Florida Living, Friends, Rant, Weird Nights Out, Youtube.
The wife’s pregnant, and she needs milk for breakfast in the morning. We’re out of milk. It’s 9:30, Sweetbay’s not closed yet. I’m off.
The first thing I head for’s the milk, because I know where it is. I rarely shop in this grocery store. I’m usually at the dirt Publix three blocks from the house because it’s closer. But, they’re closed by 9 and Sweetbay’s open, so I’m in a strange grocery store with a mission to find some nonstandard items.
On my way to the milk, I see Edy’s Grand ice cream is on crazy sale, two for seven bucks. Lunatic flavors, too… Coconut Pineapple? Cherry Chocolate Chip, red velvet style? Shit. (more…)
PMDD - New Disease
Posted on December 16th, 2006 by Chris.
Filed under: Chris' Stuff, Rant.
You don’t have to be 80 years old to say, “Back in my day…” I’m 32 years old and can distinctly recall things in my past, not too distant, that either have changed dramatically or have ceased to exist altogether in today’s world. Most notably are these “new” medical conditions, diseases, disorders, and maladies.
I just saw a commercial for a drug, I don’t recall what it was called exactly, but it was to treat this NEW condition called PMDD. This stands for Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder. As found on UnderstandPMDD.com, PMDD is…
Women who have PMDD experience a combination of emotional and physical symptoms that are severe enough to significantly interfere with how they function at school, work or in their personal relationships. These symptoms occur during the 14 days before a woman’s period.
Now, you don’t have to be too old or experienced to know that what’s described above is call Pre-Menstrual Syndrome. It’s not PMDD… it’s PMS. Emotional roller coasters, cramps, bloating, irritability, depression… seriously, historically this has been known as Pre Menstraul Syndrome, right?
Why is this upsetting to me? Because it’s further evidence that previously understood conditions are being re-labelled by the pharmaceutical industry in order to sell more drugs.
This, dear readers, is absolute bullshit.
Back in my day (a whole 20 years ago), depression was called “sadness.” Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder was called “stupidity.” Erectile Dysfunction was called “can’t get it up.” Back then, our kids weren’t doped up on Ritalin, we weren’t all doped up on Valium and Wellbutrin and Zoloft, and those of us that couldn’t get a hardon were called “unfortunate.” We LIVED with it, and that’s the way the cookie crumbled.
“But modern science has helped us understand these maladies,” you say. Bullshit, you sheep. The massive pharmaceutical companies that gross more in a year than many small nations have convinced us all through marketing and advertisements that we’re all sick… with something, and the only remedy is to medicate ourselves with guess what… their products!
Seriously, when YOU were a kid, do you EVER remember commercials for sleep aids? No, you don’t. And the reason you don’t is because back then, 10, 20, 30 years ago… people actually worked, as in physical labor, and if you do that (or excercise), you’re actually TIRED at the end of the day… and sleep wasn’t a problem. Today though, you can take Ambien and you’re all cool.
Linux Faithful Unfazed By Vista
Posted on December 2nd, 2006 by Chris.
Filed under: Chris' Stuff, News, Rant, Technology.
Among a zillion reasons not to use Microsoft products, including its latest OS release Thursday with Vista, here are some more reasons. From a recent article on Red Herring, among the biggest goofs Microsoft has once again pulled off…
But some of the rejection of Vista is because it locks up customers, once again, into proprietary software that is expensive, Mr. Perens said. Vista is also trying lock up users with digital rights management, which will prevent the software from sharing video and music. “Unfortunately, this is very anti-customer technology,” Mr. Perens said.
Aside from its expensive price point ($200-$400) and out-of-the-box technical defects, there’s the philosophical side to this. Consumer democracy will do to Microsoft, the obviously dominant software behemoth, the same that it’s done to other dynasties in the past. Eventually more people will turn to Mac, Linux, or whatever future alternative is presented to the status-quo.
It’s technolution… the inevitable shift of preference, perspective, possibilities and priorities in the modern realms of computer usage.
MPAA Seeks To Ban Friends From Your House
Posted on November 28th, 2006 by Chris.
Filed under: Absurd, Chris' Stuff, News, Rant.
MPAA Lobbying for Home Theater Regulations
by Scott Small - as reported here.
Los Angeles , CA - The MPAA is lobbying congress to push through a new bill that would make unauthorized home theaters illegal. The group feels that all theaters should be sanctioned, whether they be commercial settings or at home.
MPAA head Dan Glickman says this needs to be regulated before things start getting too far out of control, “We didn’t act early enough with the online sharing of our copyrighted content. This time we’re not making the same mistake. We have a right to know what’s showing in a theater.”
Nasal Pimple Brings Man To Knees
Posted on November 25th, 2006 by Chris.
Filed under: Chris' Stuff, Rant.
There come times in people’s lives when they get a pimple. For some, it’s often and ugly. For others, it’s less of a problem because they show up few and far between. Being way past puberty, I get them here and there but not very often.
It’s even less often that one appears inside my nose. For this I am very, very grateful because I liken this pain in my schnozz to a cross between a root canal and a colonoscopy, though I’ve had neither. The entire left side of my face feels bruised when I even casually bump my nose, throbbing painfully like a whole headache. I’m glad these things don’t show up too often, because this is not fun.
Bridezillas - An Open Letter to We Network
Posted on October 10th, 2006 by Chris.
Filed under: Chris' Stuff, Rant, Television.
Dear We Network,
I want to let you know how I feel about Bridezillas, your show about bitchy brides on their way to the altar.
My wife and I’ve been married for just over a year, and she’s recently gotten interested in your show. She has a Masters degree in English Literature, and her thesis was on reality television and its impacts on society and culture. For what it’s worth, we both agree on the following about your show, and this email won’t even begin to plumb the rhetorical, philosophical depths of our collective (reasonably informed and educated) opinions of Bridezilla.
I understand that your bottom line is what counts, and making money is pretty much the only thing of concern in the board meetings where these shows are conceived and planned. The fact that these shows are popular, and your advertisers pay top dollar (maybe) for spots during this show are key to your decision making process, is very much understood and (for lack of a better term) appreciated.
However, the message you send to America is that shallow, obsessive, asshole women are worthy of attention, the spotlight, and your camera’s focus. Following them, encouraging them with attention, cameras and lights, does nothing but perpetuate what is undoubtedly the media’s influence on such horrific statistics as the divorce rate in America, and not remotely what the rest of the world thinks of Americans. Y’know what, with programming like this, and the messages that it sends, the rest of the world is right: Americans, as you promote them, are shallow, shitty, financially irresponsible, pathetic, prickish idiots that deserve the short, statistically unstable and miserably short marriages that they get.
I think it’s abhorable that for the sake of a buck, We Network has succumbed to the status quo, surrendered to the almighty buck and wantonly perpetuates promotion of people being absurdly self-centered, impatient and frankly disgusting individuals. Thanks for fucking up America even more than it already is.
It is, however, rather entertaining.